Here’s a whole post of ways to recognize violence and how to help.
Lots of friends ask ‘Why didn’t she just leave?’ without realizing how complex the abuse is and that the most dangerous time for a survivor is when they leave the relationship.
How we can help a friend: You can never ever go wrong with believing them and saying “I’m here to help”. Listening, validating, and letting someone know what’s happening to them is abuse and not ok.
Supporting survivors like first aid; we should be practicing the skills before we ever think that we would need them.
Learning what is an isn’t violence is the first step.
We’ve got LOTS of resources on our website on how to take everyday action, #BystanderIntervention, #SupportingSurvivors, and you can always call our 24 Hour Support Line if you’re worried about a friend – 905.525.4162.
Neighbours, Friends and Families has created a list of warning signs that an abusive relationship might be lethal including:
– He has access to her and her children
– He has access to weapons
– He has a history of abuse with her or others
– He has threatened to harm or kill her if she leaves him: He says “If I can’t have you, no one will.”
– He threatens to harm her children, her pets or her property
– He has threatened to kill himself
– He has hit her, choked her
– He is going through major life changes (e.g. job, separation, depression)
– He is convinced she is seeing someone else
– He blames her for ruining his life
– He doesn’t seek support
– He watches her actions, listens to her telephone conversations, sees her emails and follows her
– He has trouble keeping a job
– He takes drugs or drinks every day
– He has no respect for the law
– She has just separated or is planning to leave
– She fears for her life and for her children’s safety or she cannot see her risk
– She is in a custody battle, or has children from a previous relationship
– She is involved in another relationship
– She has unexplained injuries
– She has no access to a phone
– She faces other obstacles (e.g. she does not speak English, is not yet a legal resident of Canada, lives in a remote area)
– She has no friends or family
Women who are under 25 years of age, disabled women, Indigenous women, and women living common-law experience violence at much higher rates.
If you are experiencing violence in a relationship: You are worthwhile. You are powerful. We are here for you. It is possible to live without violence.
It is possible to have a world without violence and we look forward to building that world with you.